The soothing tangerine color jumped off the shelf at me. Or maybe it was the word scrolled across the length of the cylinder that read “unwind” that caught my attention. As I weaved my way through the aisles of the grocery store, skipping past the jars of sauces and canned soups, blinking at the teas and coffees, chasing a sly little toddler around as he tried to hide behind mid-aisle shelves… This word had me mesmerized. I looked around to see who was watching, just like I do every month when I slip a box of “women’s best friend” into my basket (And I’ll never know why I still hide it… Every time.) and coyly placed a can under the container of banana-mango flavored puffs. Okay, two cans.
Obviously I need to relax and I’m ashamed to admit it. Or at least I was.
I found myself trying to multitask while steeping in a lavender bath meant to relax me. I had a book next to me meant to stir creativity, a face mask and cleansing drink, scrubs, my phone… In case I thought of something spectacular or just needed to send a quick email because I forgot to earlier, and I was sorting my kids toys left in the tub from the night before. It was time for an intervention. So I intervened on myself.
And okay, as I pecked that last line into my phone’s keypad, I heard an all too familiar “ding!” and switched over to check my email. Seriously. I’m slapping myself for you.
There are times that I feel energized, empowered even, by this life is happening, let’s do it all parade that seems to blast through my home. We want to move? Plan a community-wide event? Throw an all-out birthday/going away party? Make the most out of this summer, swimming, playing, picnicking, visiting? Why yes! And maybe we can do it all at once, like the guy that spins about fifty balls on his body at the same time and makes mamas feel guilty. Remember that guy?
And while I love the adrenaline that comes with schedules that have to be managed, remembering five things at once and laughing about the one that was forgotten, and carrying sleepy babes to their bed after a long day has them worn and cuddly… I’m also tired.
But I know the see-saw must shift and bring with it a day where rainy skies and cleared schedules make way for burrowing deeper into our blankets and yielding to a sweet calm as we crowd our bodies close and DO LESS. And I don’t think those days can be so fulfilling, so precious, without the days of chaos. It’s hard to fully appreciate a day of rest until you’ve had days where rest is far from sight.
A little moment shared at the pool tonight with friends.
Until that day arrives, I’m learning a few things along the way…
Say YES to the right things.
Which coincidentally means saying NO to the things that sap energy and time without making a sufficient deposit into our “Happiness” accounts. What makes you happy? What makes you thrive?
And guys, I actually had to question blogging… But blogging makes me happy. It’s reignited a passion for writing. It’s given volume to a voice that was inside me. It inspires me to look at life in a different way and enjoy the small, beautiful things. I built relationships with women I’ve never even met. And at times where I’ve felt alone, or that I could be the only one… a little comment would make it’s way through that said just the right thing.
Just like many of you.
And for that I say, thank you.
I find myself stealing away moments. Moments of quiet. Moments to close my eyes. Moments to silence the deadlines and let myself dream. Amid the rough-around-the-edges kind of days and running-around-in-circles moments, just a few minutes to regroup keeps the mantra of DO MORE alive and going.
Typing away on the keyboard while dear husband is trying to tell a story and Hell’s Kitchen plays in the background? Guilty… as we speak. Talking on the phone while your daughter tries to explain her drawing to you? Been there. It always ends in an epic fail, with all parties feeling slighted and mama swims in the guilt. So I’m putting a hold on the multitasking so I can fully engage and enjoy what I’m doing when I’m doing it. And consequently? More seems to be accomplished and I notice the beauty in the little moments I might have missed… when I remember to do it.
So maybe I don’t need that little bottle of “unwind” as much as I thought.
What about you, how do you find time to manage it all?
Christina Lusk says
I love you, for so many reasons. It’s evident that you’re super-human strength, is just that. Phil. 4:13. And, if you find yourself running around trying to do things in Michigan “one last time”, remember, none of it is probably really “the last time” at all. I can vouch for that one 🙂
In through the nose, out through the mouth,
Christina
Jamie says
I still haven’t quite found that balance, but I’m in search of it on a daily basis. Some days, I wake up, ready to conquer the world, one homemade meal and fun activity at a time, and other days, I find myself laying on the living room floor, looking up at the giant ceiling fan 20 feet above my head thinking “Why am I laying here. Ethan is still awake, I could be playing with him. And wait a minute, did I just hear the dryer beep?” And then, the guilt sets in that I’m just….SITTING. A few weeks ago, it was a Saturday afternoon and Gabe and Ethan were both napping. I wasn’t tired so I decided to take my iPod, my nail polish, my towel and a cold glass of ice tea and go on the deck and sit. I actually managed to do so for about an hour and you know what, it felt amazing. I didn’t care about laundry or checking to see if it was time to steam mop the floors. I painted my nails, I drank my tea and watched a movie and I felt relaxed. Busy days can sometimes mean hectic days. A bad day a work can quickly transgress into a bad day at home. And when that happens, little things get to me. Suddenly, Gabe NEVER helps out (in my mind), even though I know that he contributes just as much as I do. Next thing you know, I’m irritable, grouchy and the entire night is wasted on silly so-not-worth it bickering. I try to do one thing at a time. You know me, I make lists like it’s a profession, just like you do. But I’ve started making more realistic lists. Smaller, more manageable lists. And I rely a lot on Gabe. I think that as a mother and wife it’s easy to take on the role of “doing it all”. Maybe it’s because we think we can do it better or maybe it’s just wired into us. Either way, I think it’s relinquishing some of that can-do attitude to your spouse and those around you. Let’s face it. There’s days that we can do it all and rock at doing it and then there’s days when we just simply just can’t because our bodies and minds just won’t let us. I’m trying to listen more to my body and my mind. Letting them dictate my to-do’s and my to-dont’s. Instead of shooshing them so I can hear when the dryer beeps signaling that it’s time to do a dreaded chore, I’m quieting myself and trying to enjoy the small things instead of sweating them! You’re a do-er by nature. You’re a busy-body just like me. And while I think we pride ourselves on it, I also think there’s a little piece of us that is jealous of those with a more laid-back view of life (aka, Gabe)! Take it in stride, momma. You’ve got a lifetime of lists to check off, places to go and people to see!! For the time being, shorten those lists as much as you can and heck, maybe every now and again, toss ’em out that rolled down window with the window up and chai latte in hand! A new adventure awaits you, and so will your lists! Love you always!
Jamie says
**Hehe, I meant “with the RADIO up”, not the window! You get my drift!
Amanda says
This comment has been removed by the author.
Amanda says
So, you decided to join the boycott?
http://mynontraditionallife.blogspot.com/2011/06/boycott-for-peace-of-mind.html
At least for a minute or two…
Briony says
This is not my area of expertise…for one I am not a mother or a wife, so while my life is busy it is mostly because I make it that way. As you know too well I say yes to almost everything that comes my way.
That being said, I do however know what I do to unwind…there are two main things that get me to that place of peace and rebooting.
Before those two things can be done though there is a very big hurdle I must cross….I MUST close my computer. This doesn’t seem like a big thing but as you know all three of my jobs are connected to that thing. A good percentage of my life is on that thing. So to accomplish this first step and still be responsible, I have given myself specific after-work work hours…during those hours I do my best to accomplish all the MUST BE DONE items and if I don’t get to the rest I have learned to be ok with leaving some of it for tomorrow.
Now on to the two things….which you already know but this is about sharing so I am going to write it anyway hahah
1. I love getting in my car and going for a drive. I put my favorite CD of the moment in (Josh Groban) and just drive. It is my PERFECT escape.
2. Grabbing a book or a friend, hitting a coffee shop and settling in for a few hours. This one has lots of my favorite things, getting out of the house (which is a big one for me,) reading something that can either challenge me to be better in my life or something that allows me to enter a whole new world, coffee 🙂 and people watching.
So that was long 🙂
Aleta says
I’m so glad that you aren’t giving up blogging, because it would be a loss to us all. Your blog is the place I come to for inspiration, smiles, art and to feel like there is beauty in the world. I hope you find the balance and just know that moving is a big upheaval, but once you’re unpacked, life will settle back down again 🙂
The Rheinlander's says
I am still trying to figure out the balance and get organized!! I love those pics way too cute!!
Nessa says
I too go in spurts… days of frenzy lead to days of peace. I think I work better that way. I never thought about it that way though – that in order to enjoy the quiet you have to have the chaos. I love that.
Skye says
Perfect post… Its really hitting the nail on the head here. I will take a page out of your book and totally unwind!.. Like right now!Continue to inspire Tabitha! 🙂